Another Bad Update

Well it is not all bad, but the main part is. First the good news, my Grandma Blake had a spell went into ICU but is now out and doing ok, but she will be receiving an ultimatum on places she can go to be taken care of. This means that my parents might have to take care of her dog, which means I get mine!!!
So bad news. A week ago Grandpa stated he didn't want dialysis and that he was ready to go, it was hard, but I respected his decision though I am sad. Then Dr. Thomas stated she wanted to try a experimental drug on him and he agreed. This meant that he was rethinking the dialysis and was going to be moved back to MD Anderson for treatment. Unfortunately before he could be moved he caught something. You have to realize that with his low immune system, a common cold can be deadly. The first day he was throwing up, the next day he couldn't really talk, but still communicated, but now he is in a coma and is not responding to anyone's voice.
I am grateful that I was able to give him the letter I wrote to him the day before he got sick, it basically just thanked him and told him I loved him. I feel better that I got to say my good-byes through the letter and he could comment back at me. I hadn't seen him since he got sick, so last night I visited. I was expecting the worse, and that is what I got. The only thing that my family was hoping for was for him not to be in pain; we didn't want to relive a Grandma death, but it looks like that is what is happening. He was in a lot of pain with fever and most likely aching from the fever. He was restless, and his lips and tongue were cracked from all the dry air, but he wouldn't take a sponge. He is slowly asphyxiating himself when he coughs up flem, and he doesn't like to be moved. We wanted to give him morphine yesterday but the doctor never answered his page because "his pager was broken", for 8 hours, you think he would have called or they could have used a cell phone. Hopefully today he will be moved to Hospice.
I just wish he would be comfortable in his death, watching a painful death is so hard for the family.